So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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