I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
She has the best kind of daddy issues
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
