the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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