You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I just pynch a tree in the face
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Randomize
