I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Randomize
