just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
