we have pet lesbian snakes
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
you made out with another girl for some wings
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
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