I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Randomize
