On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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