my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
