is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
now i know why i became what i already was.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
