Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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