So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
