I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
