She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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