5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
