Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Randomize
