Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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