my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
