I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Randomize
