I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
