Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
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