So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
