He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Randomize
