In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Randomize
