i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
