I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
Hippo gnu deer
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
