I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I would fuck him just for his dog
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
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