if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
