new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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