their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
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