btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize