Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
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