I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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