she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize