After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize