TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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