I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
