I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize
