I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
