and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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