She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
