I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
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