We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
