i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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