Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
We don't watch enough power rangers
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize
