This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
