I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Randomize
