let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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