i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
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