Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Randomize
