oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
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