I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
She needs sedatives and a leash
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
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